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May 18 2014

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squidward-tortellini:

fuckin hero

sluttyoliveoil:

following someone for months and liking their posts to get them to notice you and then they finally follow you

image

Tumblr has made me incredibly wise but incredibly stupid, and its hard to tell which one I am most of the time

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radec-073:

helioscentrifuge:

The perfect remedy for this cold and rainy weather?
1.2 gallons of hot chocolate.

image

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creepypastaisrad:

In 2003, snorkelers in Mexico found the body of a missing woman. Her husband had pushed her off a boat.

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idk why people take me so seriously i never even know what im saying

I just want to tell you, at some point it doesn’t matter who was right and who was wrong. At some point, being angry is just another bad habit, like smoking, and you keep poisoning yourself without thinking about it.
— Jonathan Tropper, This is Where I Leave You (via a-thousand-words)
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jtotheizzoe:

wnycradiolab:

Educational pancakes.

I’m impressed not only by the skill and creativity involved here, but also by the self-control it must require to not just eat all of them immediately.

larryrickardfan:

allmymetaphors:

I don’t want to go to college but I also don’t want to NOT go to college

What I really want is to stop existing but you can’t do that without dying and I don’t want to die either

This is the most accurate post I have ever seen

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themockingjayfromgallifrey:

sideoftheweepingangels:

-superman:

casualdorkpatrol:

seekhappynights:

NARWHALS NARWHALS SWIMMING IN THE OCEAN
CAUSING A COMMOTION
BECAUSE THEY ARE SO AWESOME

important

PRETTY BIG AND PRETTY WHITE CAN BEAT A POLAR BEAR IN A FIGHT

LIKE AN UNDERWATER UNICORN
THEY’VE GOT A KICKASS FACIAL HORN
THEY ARE THE JEDI OF THE SEA
THEY’LL STOP CTHULHU EATING YE

NARWHALS

THEY ARE NARWHALS

NARWHALS

JUST DON’T LET THEM TOUCH YOUR BALLS

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fidefortitude:

isenseanunquenchablethirst:

is this what responsibilities look like

can i just

so bill nighy was wearing a motion capture suit and screaming at johnny depp

and johnny depp had to scream back

without either of them laughing

just imagine that. two grown men, one in pyjamas with balls on his face, and the other in a pirate costume, screaming at the top of their lungs at each other

punkzoo:

I think the best compliment I’ve ever received was when I was in my school library and this guy came up to me and said, “Hey you look kinda like The Legend of Zelda.”

The Legend. The entire Legend of Zelda. Wow.

*breaks into j k rowling’s house in the middle of the night* no it’s okay i’m not here to steal anything i just think we need to talk about harry naming one of his kids after snape

cumberbatched-in-the-shire:

whitebeltwriter:

There needs to be a bar or club or something that when you walk in there’s a rack of different color wristbands with words like “I looking for-“

  • girls
  • boys
  • trans
  • anyone
  • no one
  • friends
  • etc

So that everyone would know who’s looking for who.

Like:

"Hey that girl is cute. And her wristband says she’s also looking for a girl. Sweet!”

Or:

"He’s cute, but his wristband says girls. Oh well."

you are the future

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matthulksmash:

petermorwood:

What was in those jellybeans I just ate…?

That owl! He looks like he just discovered he’s not like other owls.

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xchellabella:

You guys have no idea how much money I’d save because I just wanna see the cat all the time.

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biinarykid:

stunningpicture:

Milk in cookie cup.

I GET THE PHOTO NOW….

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biinarykid:

stunningpicture:

Cookie in a milk cup.

I DONT UNDERSTAND THIS PICTURE AT ALL

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